Useless Super Powers

            The best answers:

            A: “I’d be able to fly, but I’d always crash land.”

            A: “I’d be able to piss gasoline.”

            A: “I’d be able to make paper money in to change.”

            A: “I’d be able to make change in to paper money. Obviously, we’d be mortal enemies.”

            A: “The opposite of being a chameleon - I’d be able to make myself stand out really badly whenever I'm in danger.”  

            A: “I could summon a mariachi band whenever I want, but they’ll only play when they feel like it.”

            A: I’d be able to transport to Duluth, Minnesota.

            A: “I’d be able to control the weather, but only what is occurring directly over my head.”

            A: “I could shoot confetti from my hands, but never in front of more than three people.”

            A: “My body can act as a wifi hotspot, but only for desktop computers.”